hmm soo soo soo soo many things happened over these few days...in fact these few days were just frantic outbursts of truth- truth that has never been told before....everyone is just snapping, snapped, or like me, on the verge of snapping..homework, family ( sometimes i just cant understand why parents simply assume that being a student is easy...scoring As is easy while it's not...and the worst thing is that they assume that besides being a good good good student, you have to take full responsibility for everything that happened to the other parent...when it wasnt really ur fault that she got angry and cried..and got depressed over things that were really really really minor...what do u think i am? a all rounder person? if people were perfect, then why are all our fingers not of the same length? )....friends....

in the past, in secondary school, friendship was never really an issue...in fact it was managable..although im kinda isolated myself from about half of the class due to the formation of cliques..within my own clique, friendship was just friendship. Pure friendship, smooth-sailing..until of course, the betrayal thing and the eventual finding out that at times, friendship doesn't last sometimes..but those memories were sweet and happy. But now...everything seemed to be going way way way haywire...

seriously, i really really really dun know what happened exactly..maybe it's the fact that im confused over what happened, that made me pissed off or something...people are just snapped..K snapped...I snapped..C snapped a bit..on wed, while me, M, J, S were kinda frightened...

im just confused...i dunno what happened...or just cant figure out why just something can just affect everyone easily....maybe we are just too immature in handling things..maybe we were just too indecisive..seeing the person going straight into the fire and not saving that person earlier..but is it really the time now to say who's exactly right or wrong? i dunno...in fact, im confused. CONFUSED.

All i know is that...WH is simply the cause of everything.Sorry for being extreme but it's true. Since that point, our lives were never the same again. For all of us...

Since the day i stepped in jc, everything changed. Maybe it was God's plan..and indeed, though my life was full of emotional rollercoasters, i learnt to be strong...and careful..handling things with care and thinking before i act....but now, it's simply too much for me to handle..it's like everything is simply just coming together to burden me..work, friends, family...sometimes, ( to be frank), im tempted to jump off the building...but i just couldnt. Instead i just wanna put myself in a box and hide myself away. But escapism is not a solution.

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today is stressful to a certain extent. in the morning, we were pretty tensed up...silence and during recess, though we trashed things out, we didnt actually trash things out. In fact, to some of us, we dun even know where the problem lies, so what to trash?? And of course the discussion was left there hanging, without a conclusion.

Chem was funny with the tau pok thingy and medicated oil...celebrating WH's birthday...

And the rehearsal was funny..damn funny...majority of the time was spent on trying to wear that stupid ugly irritating disgusting uniform...stockings...super big shoes..and laughing at Liz..soo blur..laughed until i wanna fall off my chair..and of course, disturbing my neighbours by commenting how big my shoes are..hahas..

( sometimes ignorance is bliss..but at times it's tragic, because ur friends are in conflict, and you know nothing about it......)

went home with peggy..but changing in the toilet was funny...mandy popped by and on our way home, many funny things happened...and suddenly i felt as though all my burdens were relieved for the time being, just by laughing together with mandy and peggy......

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I just wanna feel His presence again.

I seek Him, but...i just cant feel Him.

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However to conclude today's entry,all i wanna say is that:

Through trials and tribulations, true friendship will be strengthened.